Holiday Gift Ideas From Techno Claus

Techno Claus (looking suspiciously like Sunday Morning reporter David Pogue) offers gifts for work and play on your holiday list for the geek lover:

Hello my love, Techno Claus let's all stop by and welcome my visit! I'm here to present some high-tech gift ideas that I've been working on for 14 years straight. I'm happy to be here in your beautifully decorated room, cheap clothes, fun accents and all.

Mute button ($40)

The Stupid Epidemic had such an effect that people were shouting, "You're disabled!" they shouted. It won't happen to me! Because look at what I have: if it's green, you've heard it; If it's red, you can't. No need to mix with icons for this fun elf; I will never be mad at ________ again.

Hotdot Wireless Hand Warmers ($30)

I don't like these chemical hand warmers. You use them once and it's just a waste of time. But they are electric! Do you know of a rechargeable battery? Both sides will give you the heat of your choice. Winter doesn't mean "chill to the bone" anymore. And hey, in the blink of an eye, you can charge your phone!

Renpho Cordless Jump Rope ($26)

So guess what I do? no! It's like jumping without a jump rope! Low ceilings? no problem! Tight spaces? long hair? You can exercise while sitting in your chair! It counts your jumps on your phone or here, and if you prefer a real cable, don't be afraid!

JBL Clip 4 Bluetooth Speaker ($45)

Do you know who likes music while you work? The queers are mine! But there are regular speakers on the shelves. But this is portable, with a clip for the car, or table, or even on the hip. The sound and bass volume is very good. And it's also waterproof, which is amazing!

CovoBox ($57+)

Previously: cable and equipment accident. And then: I made all that garbage disappear! it's true! Don't be fooled by its looks: it's reliable, hand-crafted from piles of books. Books stored if not enough. What could be in the trash, now you can hide your things!

KJOY LED Car Sign ($60)

Do you often have a thought you want to express to the driver while driving somewhere? Don't be silent anymore! Enter this bluetooth screen, select a message here and broadcast! Warning, thanks, advice or animation, it all depends on you!

Therabody Smart Glasses ($200)

Let's face it, the world has us down. We have more headaches and sleep less. You can reheat as needed. The app offers tips on how to find peace and the monitor lowers heart rate. I know they aren't cheap at 200 cents. But who pays the price to refresh and sleep?

So, dear ladies and gentlemen, a generous environment. I hope you like them; I have to run now! Nobody makes battery powered sleds so I always use reindeer to get around!

Story by David Rothman. Publisher: Mike Levin.